You know the person in you that dresses up for doctor’s appointments, until you realize that’s actually hurting you because you “look fine”? I forget the actual terminology doctors put in charts, but it seems to be doctor code for … not sure what this person thinks they have but to me they look A-Okay. Anyway, that person in me was going to just post my latest watercolors with a short, but sweet message, and leave it at that, but then I realized I’m not alone here and it may help others to know they aren’t alone too. So, I’m going to be honest. The truth is my head is spinning because I’m applying for disability … A-freaking-gin. Third time is a charm? The first time I applied through Social Security was only a year out, and what I’m learning is that so much more has happened, and I have had to document it all, all the new doctors, tests, medications. I’m telling you, well-people, who will hopefully never be on this journey, it’s an insane amount of detail and when you’re ill, it’s taxing to your already fragile health. The application wants what feels like everything from a person, me, who can’t remember their last thought, let alone the date of a doctor’s appointment four years ago (thank goodness I kept wall calendars). So, I’ve been plugging away at it every day. It took me three days just to enter all the health care professionals who have seen me for my illness, four years’ worth. But they don’t just want names, they also want addresses, phone numbers, dates seen, what they saw you for, diagnosed you with, treated you for, tests they ran and medications they put you on. I get it, but when you’ve done this several times it just feels like you’re throwing water up in the air to feed the birds. It might help, it probably won’t. Regardless, I warrior on!💪
So, I guess my blog this week has turned into an all-about-me vent session (unless you can relate, and I really hope you can’t) and I appreciate you reading through. I know you could be literally doing a million other things, so thanks for the ear/shoulder/eyes/what have you. Hoping your week has been and will continue to be a peaceful, easy one.
One last thing before my brain literally short circuits 😳 I’ve learned that my favorite time of year to doodle and watercolor is the winter holiday season. Y’all it’s been so fun!!
I have almost always managed at the least a quick shower and clean clothes for drs visits. I have gone in pajamas and scrubs a lot. I think a few er visits I went as I was at the time. The only thing I care about going to a dr is being clean and in clean clothes. I then change into different clothes again when home. To me, its about germ control both ways.
Re: Disability. I understand. I am going to hearing in February. I’m still gathering documents. Get an attorney. Be sure to tell them you require phone conferences because of the nature of your illness.
I hope I can financially survive until my hearing!
Best wishes
xo ☀️
LikeLiked by 1 person
I have my dr sweatsuit. 😁It’s from the Gap, not fancy but comfy and basic. This year I decided to just go as I am and they started taking me a little more seriously, well that and my labs have way too much red on them these days.
Great advice! I had an attorney last time. Lost at the court hearing so I’m literally starting over again from scratch. I guess the good news is I have an idea of what docs are needed this time around. But I’m zero percent confident because I literally meet every single qualification of the social security requirements for CFS, and still denied, with multiple drs letters. It’s a scam I think. They push you off until your work credits expire so then they only have to pay minimum amount. Still trying though.💪 Hoping today is best as can be for you🌻
LikeLiked by 1 person
Contact your congresspersons office. They have staff members to specifically make sure that SSA is following the law. You may need to guide them through this process. Very helpful.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you! I didn’t know that was an option. My last attorney told me to wait until I’m approved to file a complaint, so I don’t ruffle any feathers I guess? I’ll check that out though! My hearing was unfathomable. The judge didn’t ask me one question about my health, daily life, or disability. It was a joke. Hopefully someone can go back and listen to it someday and see what an absolute fraud he was. Grrr Deep breaths 🧘♀️😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
It can be reversed and put back into that stage or reversed into your favor.
Congressional support is not necessarily for complaints only, its support to help you through an arduous process. Everyone should be in touch with the representative in Congress. It also helps ME because they become more aware of our illness.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’ve reached out to him a couple times regarding awareness issues for MECFS but never to find help for myself. It seems the time has come.💪🌸
LikeLiked by 1 person
Find an attorney experienced in ME. Post for recommendations. Many practice in every state.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I posted on twitter but didn’t hear of anyone in San Diego. I’ll keep at it. It’s so exhausting fighting for yourself, when you already feel like your fighting for life necessities, like getting yourself fed throughout the day.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh, God. I remember the initial application for my sibling and now the annual renewals of benefits. Evernote’s a godsend. I just snap pics of all medical release papers, directives, lab results, receipts etc. I even snap pics of doctors’ cards just because of that “what’s their address” thing. Like, when someone is in the ER four times in two months, no way I’d remember ever person who saw him otherwise, but stupid SSI will want that report to make sure he remains disabled. Blargh. Good luck. Totally a subject worth venting about. I feel your pain.
LikeLiked by 2 people
I’ll have to check into Evernote. I’d heard of it before. There’s got to be a better way of doing this. Part of it, imo, is that they’re so shady they make you do all this somehow to fail you. It’s like if we gather enough eventually something is going to be wrong. Can’t control the drs offices. Thank you for your compassion, it’s not how I’d choose to spend my time. Hoping you’re staying warm! I heard there’s a cold snap coming.
LikeLike
Oh Mishka, I’m so sorry this is so difficult. I know the SSA has a job to do, and they have to make sure each person has a legitimate need, but it seems the burden of proof is almost excessive, doesn’t it? Wishing you much success with getting it to go through this time. Hang in there, and don’t forget — you ARE a warrior! As always, I love your watercolors. You’re so talented! Sending hugs!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Terri, for your compassion. Having worked in legal compliance for years I get the rules, but I’m following them and they keep denying. Certainly not ethical but that’s all I’ll say there. We warrior on to fight another day.🌻 Hoping today treats you kindly.
LikeLiked by 1 person
This must be such a stressful process for you. Thinking of you, and hoping for third time lucky. And that they treat you with a little more dignity this time round xx
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Siobhan! Such a pain in the patoot. Fingers, and toes crossed. Maybe they’ll realize I’m not going away, like an annoying mosquito in the dark. Hoping you’re enjoying Summer!😎
LikeLiked by 1 person
Goodness, this is ridiculous. I would never be able to recall all that info. Really hope you get the help you need my friend.
Love the watercolours!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you! 😊 One foot in front of the other.👣
LikeLike
I’m really hoping third time lucky, it’s ridiculous to put people through this, and so stressful. I could never remember all of that stuff! x I love all your watercolours as usual, and sending big hugs. 🙂 xxx
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you for your compassion and kindness!🌻 It is ridiculous, considering how much documentation they already have (800 pages according to last attorney). But we soldier on!
LikeLiked by 1 person
So true, we put on our best “I’m okay!” costumes for the world to see, because society expects us to, and then it’s so easy to think everyone is okay. 😦
I’m sorry to hear you’re having a rough time, and I hope the rest of the application process goes smoothly.
Those are beautiful watercolors, by the way! 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you for stopping by and for your compassion! I hope the rest is any bit easier too! Hoping today treats you kindly!🌸
LikeLike
I didn’t actually read anything in your blog post as I am too tired to read much these days but I love to scroll down and see your paintings. If only my hands weren’t so weak and I could paint as often as you do. I love the Winnie the poo one with the quote, I love Winnie the Poo and the elf, snowman and the cane cane heart. They are such creative ideas. You are all ready for Christmas. Can I include some of your artworks in my blogger art awards next year?
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m so sorry to hear you’re feeling as you are. Hoping today treats you kindly.🌸 And yes feel free. I don’t sign them usually as I’m just doing it for fun. Sending 🥄 🥄 🌻
LikeLike
So what will happen is I will be posting them up on my AllheART page in a poll for people to vote for their favourites and then you can all vote and there will be a winner every three months.
LikeLiked by 1 person
And thank you for your kind comment.
LikeLiked by 1 person
AllheART will be starting up a Christmas card drive next year too similar to the one on The Mighty but in Australia and I’d love for you to send me a few of your holiday artworks to feature on the cards I will deliver to hospitals.
LikeLiked by 1 person
How generous of you! That’s a really neat idea. You’re welcome to post or print anything you see. I post everything I paint that is even mildly tolerable.😁 Hoping today is treating you kindly. 🌸 It’s Summer for you now, right?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes. It’s summer and my body hasn’t been tolerating the heat very well! Last week we had a 38 degree day and tomorrow it will be 32 degrees.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes it’s summer in Australia and it’s boiling hot. It was 38 degrees yesterday! If I manage to organise the Christmas card drive next year I would like to recognise people who send me artworks for the cards though so you should sign them then.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hoping you’re able to stay comfortable in those temps! 🌸
LikeLiked by 1 person
It’s funny because I actually made a candy cane heart colour in sheet.
LikeLiked by 1 person
😊 Candy canes are so cheerful.🌺
LikeLiked by 1 person
I hear you Mishka re our invincible illnesses & the statement “you look well today”!
I remember when my late husband was in hospital after just having brain surgery, his friend came to visit & said the same statement! My husband had a shaved head with a huge cut & 38 metal staples in it!
Such cute watercolors! ♥
Blessings,
Jennifer
LikeLiked by 1 person
I think it’s meant as a compliment. It seems sick people make a lot of well-people uncomfortable. I think it’s fear settling in because nobody wants to be sick or have it in their face. It’s not until you’re sick that it doesn’t feel nice anymore and that’s not something you’d otherwise know. I’m sorry your late husband and you went through what you did. And thank you for the compliment.🌺
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes, I agree Mishka, people are very uncomfortable with disease (I suppose that’s why its been called dis ease) & chronic health sufferers, they don’t know what to do with us…& yes I agree I believe people mean the statement as a source of encouragement…definitely 😀
I wasn’t upset by the comment & apologies if I gave that impression in my previous comment but rather found it interesting how others react to serious health situations (including myself 😉 ).
Thank you for your kind words…
Blessings,
Jennifer
LikeLiked by 1 person
I went with Allsup. They handled just about everything and all I had to do was talk to them on the phone. Amazing because I was just too sick to deal with any of that. I feel sorry for anyone who talked to me during the time I was going through the waiting because I was constantly crying. You have to be superhuman to get all the info and documentation they ask for, especially with deadlines! Hang in there!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you for that information, Sandra! Wondering if they handle second time round. Most attorneys won’t touch it if you’ve been denied at hearing level. I’ll check with them. Hoping today is kind to you🌸
LikeLike
Love the watercolors! I hope you can get through all of the hoop jumping they want you to do. It truly is crazy. Wishing you a beautiful holiday.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Lisa! Hoping your holiday season is lovely as well! Such a fun season to create art.😊🌺
LikeLike
So true! I am at the point now that I go as I am-no energy to “look good.”
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yep, me too. We’re programmed as females to look nice no matter what. I’d rather use my energy to get through the day as best as possible.🌻
LikeLiked by 1 person
Totally agree:)
LikeLiked by 1 person