Mini Update

Whelp, I’m in an awful flare. On top of that, for the past couple of weeks my heart rate has been plummeting, and then shooting up high in the afternoons for no obvious reason. In other words, I’m not standing or doing anything to cause it. This morning I took my BP because I’ve been feeling awful and it came back low (no surprise) but with an ‘irregular heartbeat detected’. So, on top of feeling utterly awful my heart is being wonky and frankly I’m frustrated. I’ve been to the ER for a wonky EKG reading (at the Drs) during a flare, and I’m not going to put myself through that again (so sick of condescending and/or unwilling to say they don’t know but also refuse to research health care people). When I’m out of the flare I’ll take it up with the cardiologist, who has familiarity with postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome (POTS). I have to be honest though, it doesn’t help that my mom, who I suspect had MECFS, passed away from heart failure at right around my age…so there’s that. Please, please don’t worry about me, if it gets worse or there’s pain I will go to the ER. Take good care and if I may, I’d like to ask if you get the chance this week show someone a bit of kindness. Before I was chronically ill, I’d aim for doing one thing each day that was kind to another person. I still do it, but it’s almost always on social media now. You know that saying – be the change you want to see in the world? I like it, I live it as best as I’m able. A few more doodles. Until next week, wishing you the best of the best. 🌸

21 thoughts on “Mini Update

  1. Tamara

    I’m so sorry you are struggling right now Mishka! Please know I’m praying for you and how much your blog posts mean to me. Take extra good care of yourself and do whatever makes you feel special right now, because you are. To a lot of people! Sending you lots of soft hugs and healing energy.
    ~ Tamara

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Aw, I could use a mother hen right now, so…hen away!! ❤
        Yes, I'm taking breaks and trying not to freak out within the chaos! I am taking it a day at a time. 😉
        And I'm glad that you're feeling a tad better. 🙂

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  2. Since I can’t do anything to make you feel better, I will instead show kindness to someone. My kindness will be that I don’t actually murder someone though since I am one day 3 of no cigarettes. Hope I made you chuckle! Feel better my friend

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  3. I am so sorry to hear this Mishka. I know how difficult it is to live with POTS, it can be so unpredictable which is why we really need a cure or a better treatment. Relapses are just awful. I feel you. Take care of yourself and don’t push yourself too much, which I know you don’t. Sending you lots of hugs. XO Keep up with your lovely artworks. 🙂

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    1. Thank you for your compassion 🌸 Having MECFS and POTS feels like some kind of bitter irony. The ME flares force you to not move and the POTS worsens because you’re not moving, but the more you move the ME worsens. Our country is spending billions of dollars on ludicrous things but not helping a fraction of an amount with research funding. So frustrating. But we chin up and live the best day possible. Hoping all is best as can be with you 🌷

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  4. Oh Mishka. “Please, please don’t worry about me” – It’s like saying please don’t eat the chocolate cake in front of you, of course we’re going to! 😂
    I’m so sorry you’re feeling so damn awful. It sounds more than frustrating and tough and I can see where you’re coming from with the worry, and thinking about your mum is going to amplify those concerns. I think it’s a good idea to raise this with the specialist again once you’re ‘back on your feet’ (so to speak 😉). I don’t blame you not wanting to go to the ER but please take good care of yourself and hopefully you won’t need the hospital, but please do go if it gets worse or isn’t improving. I imagine stress and worry is only going to compound how awful you’re feeling right now so perhaps some distraction would be good? Doodling, TV, reading, anything. Snuggle up, stay warm and hydrated and I’ll keep my fingers crossed the heart calms down and the flare eases up. Sending hugs  ♥
    Caz xxxx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m just seeing your comment. Not sure why. 😐 I apologize for the delayed response.

      Tomorrow I’ll call the Cardiologist. Was hoping it was a fluke but repeat tests are still showing irregular. Thank you for your compassion. It really does mean a lot to me. Ive been trying to just emotionally take it as easily as possible. We do our best don’t we? Hoping you weren’t in the path of the latest storm. I’ve heard it packed a strong punch. And I must mention because I’m not a big fan of vaguebooking (people who post mystery posts 😁) I will update if any answers are found. Hopefully my little ticker is just being feisty. Sending hugs and thank you’s for your compassion.Sometimes it feels like we’re on an island when the body starts to go wonky but it’s nice to be reminded that’s not true. 💕

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Sorry to hear about your flare! The heart rate variability with POTS is tough. My HR has been dropping a lot lately, too, but still climbs when I stand. Heart failure runs in my family, too. It’s scary, and it’s so hard not to worry, even when we know that only makes it worse.

    Please take care of yourself. Thinking of you.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Lindsay 🌸 I go through phases where I just can’t deal with all the appointments and I have to press pause and just be. Monday it’s back to reality, which means calling the cardiologist. I’m wondering, and please feel free to not answer if too personal, while standing does your heart rate ever drop like 30-40 points then shoot up like 50 to 60 points, but then come back down? I’m trying to figure out what’s going on. I know I need to go to the FB groups but they feel intimidating to me. 😊 Anyway thank you for your kindness and I’m hoping things are going as well as possible. 🌸

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  6. I too like to spread kindness, it’s just automatic. Recently I’ve had so much kindness bestowed upon me I’m a bit overwhelmed by it and find myself wondering if something negative will come along to cancel it out. But it sure is nice.
    I’m sorry you are in such a flare, I’m glad you are getting the wonky heart rate checked out. I trust you to know your body and to get help if needed before you can get in to see your doctor.
    I love your little bear, especially the one where he’s looking at the picture of the sunflower. Hugs and healing your way.
    (I have been trying to keep up with you, I have just been reading your post in my email and don’t get over to comment like I should. 🙁 know I still care.)💕💕

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for your compassion! It’s good to see that people having been kind to you! 🌼 And yes, I can relate, I too read a few blogs through email but then don’t comment, which I feel guilty for😑. But in the end we do our best. 🌸 Thank you for your comment and I’m hoping today continues with that kindness coming your way!!

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