Who else is spending precious energy on reading or watching the news lately? Just me? It’s exhausting, isn’t it? I’m trying to only check a time or two a day, but it seems like it’s in your face, everywhere you look. You know who some of the MVPs are turning to to avoid it? Netflix and Amazon, and any other streaming service. You can just tuck yourself away and forget about the world as you know it with those little gems. 😊 Eventually though there’s only so much avoiding you can do and then reality begins to settle back in.
It’s been eye opening to see everyone chomping at the bit to resume their typical lives, and understandably so, it’s incredibly disruptive to have your life interrupted in such an extreme way. My partner, who considers himself an ambivert (a person whose personality has a balance of extrovert and introvert features), is crawling the walls. Truthfully, he’s not an ambivert, he’s a true-blue extrovert. I, on the other hand, am a true-blue introvert, and I’m incredibly thankful for that little blessing as a person who is housebound from chronic illness. He describes his early life as an only child as lonely, whereas, even though I was far more isolated, I was never lonely. Who could feel lonely with books? 😊 That introverted nature though, at times like these, boy does it help!
When I was first chronically ill and became housebound, I realized that others, who were also housebound but extroverted suffered from the isolation far more. You can take a stroll through social media and pick up pretty easily who the housebound extroverts are, and who the introverts are, peeking out from behind their quieter lives with more subtle posts. Truthfully, my heart has always gone out to the extroverted chronically ill, it probably feels similar to an introvert having to the be the life of the party all day, every day. Rough. Don’t get me wrong, I have days where the house feels like what I assume a jail cell would feel like. Days where the walls feel like they’re closing in. Days where I sit in horror of what my life has become. But they pass and I’m back to enjoying the peacefulness in the moment. Whereas housebound extroverts are trapped in the reality of solitude and that must be simply awful.
At the end of the day, and in my opinion, this pandemic has not only highlighted our differences, but it has also put us in a position wherein we must be in this together. And it’s been interesting to watch people’s reactions when asked to be selfless, when pushed out their comfort zones, not only to protect themselves, but to protect others. Not sure if I’ve ever shared this here before but I kinda loath where I live. I’m more of a small-town girl at heart and where I live often feels like ‘self-centered central’. I follow along with the NextDoor app in my neighborhood for crime and safety, but lately, it’s only reaffirmed my feelings. People are posting about how it’s ridiculous that we are still in self-isolation, that we are tanking the economy, that we should let people die off that can’t handle the virus (yes, seriously). It’s gross. I know I should appreciate how many people comment in protest saying how horrible that is and that we are protecting those more vulnerable. In fairness, there are far more people saying things need to stay locked down, but in my opinion, this shouldn’t even be a debate. I keep telling myself those people, who are dying to get back to work, or whatever it is that want to do, maybe they are the extroverts amongst us, and they are truly miserable being cooped up. I’m not naïve, I get the economy is tanking before our eyes. I lost my job during the last recession in 2009 and had to shift out of the financial industry. My partner currently works in the financial industry, trust me, I’m just as worried that he will lose his job as I am about the overall economy…HOWEVER, can we just, for five minutes put human life first? Life will resume, extroverts can go back to being the life of the party and introverts can go back to enjoying peaceful quiet moments, but first, right now, we need to take care of one another. We are all in this together folks, each and everyone of us. The quicker we flatten the curve the quicker life gets back to normal.
Stay inside, stay home, have your food delivered if you can, because there are many people who cannot. They must go to work still and everyday they are sacrificing their lives for those of us who are posted up at home, where it’s generally safe and warm and virus free. To all of you are out there providing essential service, my son included, you’re in my deepest thoughts and prayers, and I’m staying home for me and for YOU. A few more of my doodles below.🌸